Thursday, February 16, 2012

Screw You, Engle.


Oh geez, this guy. I wish I had more energy tonight to waste on this, but I don't. So, I'll just let this giant egotistical mouthpiece spew his bile and be done with it. Why does he always sound like he just got off of 4 day bender in a motel, where he smoke and drank everything he could get his hands on? He probably woke up an hour before this, groaned and remembered that he had to go yell at some punk ass kids for a while about something that he will make up in the car as he goes. Why do people listen to this guy?? And what's with his little bobbing and weaving WWE wrestler thing he has going on sometimes? He really should be wearing spandex or something, no? I expect him to take out a folding metal chair any minute and start wacking people with it. Boy do I loathe this man.

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Whitney Houston News Now....


I wrote this the other day and sent it to someone at a mock news blog. They didn't use it....so here it is:

This morning it was announced that singer and “actress” Whitney Houston passed away from still undetermined causes. Within minutes of hearing of the death of the 48 year old, executives from her record label quickly booked an emergency meeting to explore all ideas on how to fully exploit the situation for maximum profits. “So far, we are pleased with the results….I mean, devastated by what happened. We have heard the body has cooled considerably, making her come back less likely….er, I mean, we are saddened to hear,” stated one record company employee. Already, editors have begun pasting together a shoddy, full length, 3D Imax concert/biography movie. Work has also started on assembling a CD box set of all her music, including many “lost” tapes and “never heard before” tracks that have mysteriously popped up out of nowhere. And several reworked and remastered editions of “The Bodyguard” are being prepared, with extra footage, hilarious outtakes and an intimate concert experience with Kevin Costner. 

As funeral arrangements are being made, the Jackson family is reportedly trying to figure out how they can capitalize on the event. Tito has written a song which the family is calling, “The greatest anthem to Whitney ever written.” Rumours are for a planned wardrobe malfunction to bring further attention to the family whose spokesperson stated, “Any press is good press, right?” As well, civil rights icon, Jesse Jackson is writing his speech in which he is set to talk about how inspirational he was to her. Al Sharpton is also expected to attend and ramble on about something. As well, reports are that an illegitimate daughter has been found in Texas who is being groomed to make a “tear jerking” speech that is “sure to bring the house down.” Already, the Westboro Baptist Church has made plans to picket the wedding saying that, “She once knew someone who was gay and didn’t chastise them properly enough about it, and this is why she died! God hates gays and people who aren’t assholes to them!” 

Tabloids have begun to seek out photos of the death scene and any embarrassing or stunning facts surrounding the death for print as soon as physically possible. If anyone, from anywhere on the planet, has any idea whatsoever of what may or may have not happened to Whitney in her final “dramatic minutes” before her death, they are being advised not to contact police, but to contact local tabloid offices.

UPDATE: They used it. Thanks goes out to them. Here it is on their site: http://globalnewsnetwork.us/2012/02/16/record-company-promises-full-exploitation-of-dead-celebrity-whitney-houston/

Friday, February 3, 2012

BBC News - Google changes enable 'per country' blog takedowns

BBC News - Google changes enable 'per country' blog takedowns

Et tu, Google and Blogger? This gives me some incentive to leave Blogger altogether sadly. Not that I have been an overly great blogger, either in frequency or quality, and they would probably be happy to see me go. But, that's beside the point. The point is, I really wish these companies would stop pandering to every country with a complaint. This is just giving countries more controls over their people and what they want them to see and experience. It is not a positive thing. People everywhere deserve the freedom and opportunity to read what they wish to read, or enjoy whatever content they wish to enjoy, no? This only gives governments the freedom to restrict the freedom of their citizens.

Sad move, especially on the heals of Twitter tweets being blocked in certain countries now. As far as I am concerned, the only tweets that should be blocked are Justin Bieber related ones. That will truly help society as a whole!

I'm (Sorta) Back

Goodness me, it has been a long time since I posted on here. Well, enough of that! I shall start again! First post back!

Okay, well, that's all I have to say.