Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Author of the Day: Leo Tolstoy

Today's "Author of the Day" is Leo Tolstoy, just like the title of this blog post suggests.

Tolstoy, as most people know, is most famous for having three toes on his left foot and six toes on his right. He was named after a lion who had a similar name: Leo. The moniker reflected his nature - furry, yellow, laid around a lot, ate his meat raw.

He was a very prolific writer, a man truly ahead of his time. He wrote the autobiographical books Tolstoy 1 and Tolstoy 2, which were later brought to the silver screen. Marketer's changed the titles of the movies, feeling that Toy Story would appeal to a wider audience.

A great love of his was acting. He is best known for playing the role of "creepy, boring, pointy-eared alien #1" on the original Star Trek television show, alongside "odd speaking hunk and alien chick magnet #1". He also released a number of hit singles that no one listened to.

He married twice. His first marriage ended when his wife didn't show up to their wedding. His second marriage was more successful, making it to the honeymoon phase before rupturing. Heartache led to depression which led to an addiction to snorting ink directly from ink wells. Friends would see that black ring around his nostril and know that he was "on the ink" again. Eventually, he was able to kick the ink habit, but the damage it had done to his career, his reputation, his finances and his nose was irreversible.

And there you have it! Today's "Author of the Day", Leo Tolstoy.

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